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| Ah, so here I am a month later...Wow a lot has happened within the last month!
I stopped ana (as i always do) and now i'm starting up again.
This time im SERIOUS!
But anyways...
Rob is complete drama. After hanging out a lot and finding out that his ex-girlfriend keeps trying to get back with him, I've decided that he's a nutcase. His friends are awesome, tho. We had sex twice (which was awesome, mind you) so I'm kind of disappointed.
Moving on...
On Friday I went to the comedy club with a certain hot flight instructor...6'4, brown hair, blue eyes, very sexy.
It's funny, cuz I had my eye on him for the longest time, but I just assumed he thought I was a little girl (I'm 18, he's 29).
It's weird because the age difference sounds like SO much, but when we hang out it feels like we're the same age. That's what I love about the adult world, since ive been 18, all the people I hang out with are 19 to 30. It's pretty cool...
But anyways he KISSED ME before I got in my car! I didn't know whether to laugh, scream, or melt. So I melted.
Good times...
I'm doing really well with eating healthy foods lately, and I've learned not to COMPLETELY starve myself, cuz when I do, that's when I binge. I've learned to eat just enough to keep me from feeling like I'm going to throw up or faint.
Breakfast:
Special K Red Berries w/ a little bit of 2% milk (boo) : About 250 cals
Snack/Drink: Diet Pepsi : 0 cals
Lunch:
1/2 cup canned spinach : 30 cals
8 oz. Strawberry Nirvana Jamba Juice: 80 cals (gotta love the "Enlightened" smoothies)
1 slice swiss cheese: 70 cals
Exercise: 200 cals
Total so far: 430 - 200 = 230 cals
Yayy! Now the hard part is being at home tonight when I get stomach cramps...
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| So i ran 7 and a half miles today...hah, it seems I only write in here as long as I'm feeling good and doing well!
Anyways, I want to use this as a personal blog also.
I dont wanna go completely ana, just lose weight in a FAST and healthy way.
I saw the movie "Waiting" with Rob on Saturday...oh my god it was SOOO hilarious. It was funnier than i expected.
I don't know what I think about Rob yet...he's tall, has the emo hair that i love, but still I don't know what I think yet...He's having a party this saturday for his new apartment, so I'm planning on going to that.
Let's just say I'm not getting my hopes up on any male.
Meanwhile I've got the Marine Officer...
Hmm.
xoxo
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| My finals are OVERRRR!!! Ahh! yay...
Im so happy but it doesnt seem over yet.
The good thing is i can go back to my diet. Ive been eating so crappy the past 2 days, i didnt wanna feel sick or pass out for my finals.
Sooo yay im happy now!!!
xoxo | | |
| OMG i feel so ashamed...
I came back from class and I was soo hungry i was shaking.
My dad had brought home hummus and pita bread from the local Greek restaraunt, so my mom made some for me.
THEN she insisted that i have some protein, so i had tuna.
And it was downhill from there.
I had 2 slices of swiss cheese too, cuz i was craving it.
Then i had chocolate milk, and some hot chocolate cuz i was craving chocolate and i didnt want to eat a chocolate candy bar.
Blah, i feel gross now.
It sucks, cuz i actually HAVE to eat and be somewhat healthy and functionable because i have my Stats final tomorrow, then on thurs. i have my English Composition final where I write an essay in class.
Eck.
Once school is out i'll be back on track. I cant give up just yet. | | |
| The ONE good thing about having an evening class is that I dont tank up on food.
I'm usually getting ready to leave when Dad says, "So kiddo, what do u wanna have for dinner tonight?"
Luckily I can run out the door and say, "Oops, i'm gonna be late!! I'll find something to eat!"
Dad is at the health club right now and Mom's upstairs. Dad eats soooo much food and he gets so mad if I point it out. I'm not mean about it, but I just point out that the huge handful of almonds he has is fattening. He gets all offended and goes upstairs. And he wonders why he can't lose weight when he goes to the health club.
He's a closet eater, I know that...He gets coffee before he works out, but he puts a ton of cream and sugar in it. Then he gets coffee after he works out and he eats, too. I find candy wrappers in his car sometimes, and I know we dont' have that type of candy in the house.
Even Mom gets onto him about it. Mom has really bad joints and she's in pain all the time but she tries to exercise when she can. She's a little overweight, but I've seen pictures of her when she was 18/19 and she was TINY! She always talks about how she wishes she could work out as much as she used to.
I'm trying to take advantage of my age. I'm 18 now, I wanna stay small for when I get older hopefully. I wanna be a cute little Desperate Housewife, haha.
My stomach is burning. Usually by now I would be running into the kitchen to make a fatty lunch, but I've learned to like the pain.
I always thought that was crazy when I saw people write that, but I'm getting really into it now.
Pass the water, please!
xoxo | | |
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